Saturday, June 8, 2013

Let The Rains Come

Rain is something I have grown fond of and now I truly love it. Not torrential like rains, but instead the soft spring and summer rains that come in at just the right times to cool things off. I love the kind of rain that prevents me from having to water the lawn, the potted plants, or my newly established garden. I love the kind of rain lets my kids go outside and splash in puddles or try to catch the falling drops in their mouths as they giggle out loud. I love the sounds of their laughter! It creates a simple yet profound joy deep in my soul.

My new love for rain did not come naturally to me. When I was younger, it seemed that the rain just messed up my plans. I would check the weather and if there was even a hint of rain that could ruin my outdoor activities, I would get upset with worry. I was the bride who really would have loved an outdoor wedding yet I let the threat of rain "ruin everything" so I opted for a traditional church wedding instead. While it was everything that I had dreamed, there was still a small part of me, once I saw the forecast for my wedding day, that wishes I had chosen the outdoor option.

I have had many moments where if I had been confident in the forecast I could have been prepared for what lied ahead. Had I known that breast cancer was coming, I would have probably started having children earlier so that I could have the three we always dreamed of. Had I known that my reconstruction wouldn't work, I would not have tried it at all. Had I known that many of my friends would move out of our transient Army community, I wouldn't have befriended them in order to save myself some heartache. Had I known that Kate and Cathey were going to die of breast cancer, I certainly would not have become soul sisters with them. Each of these events, I would consider, a rainy season. Yet it was in these rainy seasons that I grew so much.

For example, I grew in my relationships as I no longer took any second of any day for granted. I was able to really be present in those relationships instead of just being present and waiting for the next thing. I grew to trust Jesus more than ever...especially in His sovereignty. While I didn't understand why this health crisis was happening to me, I did come to understand that none of my pain and suffering was in vain and that God was using it all for His glory. And I grew in the knowledge of all things related to my type of cancer... how if affects the physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental sides of not just the patient but also their support systems.

Had the rains not come, I would still be living in a drought. I would still be waiting on someone to come along and refresh me with some water from a hose or spigot. Instead, I was well watered and can now begin the process of flourishing.

Flourish: to grow luxuriantly, or thrive in growth.

So I am thankful for the rains. I see how beauty and growth comes from occasional rains and I actually long for it at times. I have no doubt that they will come again, and this time, when they do I will not run for cover. I will not grab my umbrella, rain boots, and rain coat. Instead, I hope that I will dance in the rain and allow myself to be refreshed by the One who makes and controls the rains.

No comments:

Post a Comment